1. |
Mistress Jen
05:58
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Let me introduce myself, I'm a bit of brute
I'll stomp on you with my big black boot
I'm the kinda girl who won't put up with any crap
Come over here boy and put your head in my lap
I'll make you beg I'll make you grunt
I'll make you crawl up my leg and kiss my --
I think about sex and who I want it with next
I think about the world would be better if run by me
Now that you're mine
I'm gonna do what I want with you
Just call me Mistress Jen
Don't worry, Babe
Just do what I tell you to
Just call me Mistress .....Jen
Told me once you'd do anything for me
Even offered to steal a flower for me
Got excited with my growing abuse
"Beautiful Trouble" is what you called me
Get down on the floor and crawl around like a worm
I get a big kick out of watching you squirm
I'm a saucy dominatrix with a bad attitude
Some of my songs are just a little bit rude
I talk about sex and how I want it done next
I talk about how the world would be better if run by me
Now that you're mine
I'm gonna do what I want with you
Just call me Mistress Jen
Don't worry, Babe
Just do what I tell you to
My name is Mistress .....Jen
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2. |
WWW.Dot.Com
03:04
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I'm starting up an internet company
Won't you invest in me
Next year I'm gonna make you $20 million
No seriously
I've got business model that's so innovative
It's already being copied
Gonna spend a lot on a really wicked site and then
Get all my products for free
W W W Dot Com
I'm starting up an internet company
Won't you come work for me
There's a lot of stress and damage control
But you'll get a big salary
Come on and hustle everyone you know
Use all your connections for me
Whatever you do don't spend a dime
We're gonna get everything for free
W W W Dot Com
I'm starting up an internet company
Won't you distribute through me
Only 1% of products sell online
So you'll have to give them to me for free
The orders haven't started coming in yet
We'll just have to wait and see
And I just found a bug in our shopping cart
So you'll have to be patient with me
Yeah our stock price just took another dive
So you'll have to be patient with me
W W W Dot Com
I've got a floundering internet company
I'm under lots of pressure and I need somebody
To make all the decisions for me
Money's running low, it's almost gone
'Cuz I can't get anything for free
I can't afford to pay back anyone I owe
'Cuz i just bought another company
W W W Dot Com
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3. |
Imaginary Blues
03:53
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Gotta good life
A roof over my head
I gotta a good-paying, steady job
A good man in my bed
Yeah I got little to complain about
but that don't stop me
I'm fishing for sympathy
and soothing words to prop me
My head's in a tizzy
I'm all upset
about things that haven't even
happened yet
I'm a natural born pessimist
What can I do,
I've got the imaginary blues--
My self-serving bias
is pathologically reversed
I can't recognize a good thing
'cuz I'm convinced I'm cursed (in a way I am)
Life's little victories
I can't enjoy
What if it all ends tomorrow?
What if it's all a ploy?
My refusal to give up my sadness
is the first step on the road to madness
Worrying's the only thing
I know how to do
I've got the imaginary blues-
My problems are figments
of an under-worked mind
I make mountains out of molehills
Just because I've got the time
Don't have enough catastrophes
that are real and true
I've got the imaginary blues--
The clinically depressive, low-self-esteem-based,
negative-self-talk -inflicted im-a-gi-nar-y-----blues--
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4. |
Filthy Swine
04:08
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I'm drowning deep in the shallow pool
of your filthy mind
I'm so glad you've decided to join
The leagues of the filthy swine
I'd love to hear your jaded pearls of wisdom
over and over again
I'll be back when you're finished talking bout yourself
You just let me know when
You've been in this business for too damn long
Without any fortune or fame
Other than your small select circle of friends
Who the hell has heard your name?
You crave widespread love and approval
like you crave all the drugs you use
You need all the validation you can get
to fill the hole left by the abuse
Deep down inside, you're a sweet scared little boy
With a heart of gold
But it's you're raging ego-holic moments that
leave everybody cold
you're too busy trying to impress everyone
with your caustic wit
You have an ego like a big fat pig
Rolling around in your own shit.
You're dominating every conversation to hide
your feelings of inadequacy
You're a much nicer person when you listen
and you don't have to pitch to me
You've gotta temper and you've got more baggage
than a travelling celebrity
I'm not your mother, I'm not your ex-girlfriend
so don't take it out on me
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5. |
Just for the Hell of It
04:08
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Mistress Jen Kitchener, Ontario
Vancouver-born keyboardist, Mistress Jen has been performing her quirky, refreshingly uncensored songs since the early 2000s, both solo and accompanied. Having played in various bands over the years, she has evolved as a songwriter with bizarrely humorous takes on sex/kink positivity, feminism, drug use, relationships, and other subjects, none of which are intended to be taken seriously at all. ... more
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